This summer I competed against The Brother in a game. You may not find this remarkable, but then you may not have over 40 years of competitive failure behind you. I only agreed to play at all because he’d had a dreadful round, scoring zero points. Beating a score of zero is something I can realistically aim for. The Brother, Spurs Fan, Arty Lady, Little Miss Pink for Now and Girl1 were in full competition mode while I lay about, taking pictures of bunting, flowers and cake. I don’t do competition. It’s not really my style.
Yeah, yeah, Speccy, so you say…
This week I remembered a team building event held many years ago. We were paired up, facing each other. We had to take hold of the other’s hand, and were tasked with having the pair of hands lying flat on the table. While most of the group arm wrestled to a ‘victory’, there were 2 pairs that did not. One wise couple simply agreed to place their hands on the table. One stubborn couple fought on until stopped by the facilitator- neither of them having yielded at all. They were locked in a power struggle, neither of them willing to cede an inch. Reader, I was part of that couple. Little ole ‘non-competitive’ me.
It’s the blog awards have me thinking.
Most of the categories are assessed by a panel of judges, so for “Best Personal Blog” a small group of folk will call here to visit and then mark what they see- appearance, content, writing and any signs of bloggy goodness. Those with top marks will go into a shortlist- which will be announced- and then there’ll be a different group of judges (I assume) re-mark the shortlist superblogs.
The “Best Blog Post” category is a whole different way of working. It’s the reality tv style popularity contest, and I’ve had really mixed feelings about it since voting started. We all have one vote per week, but I like more than one of those posts- some showcase the sort of writng that makes me think “That. I want to do that.” I’ve been inspired, entertained and moved by some of the posts. (Also, I think they may need to create sub categories, but I’m not even going to win “Best Blog Post About Waiting For Your Mother To Die”, dammit.) On the other hand, I’m not impressed by others at all. The technical posts, the posts that may be mildly amusing in a particular context, the less than original posts; they all do nothing for me. Yes, they do have more votes than mine, but so do many of the posts I really admire; I am trying to be objective here.
So, how am I feeling about the competitive side of this? That depends what day it is. Initially it was all a bit of fun, sharing great new writing, discovering new blogs to follow. Then I got Spurs Fan to vote. I had a vote! Hurrah! Oh, look, more than one vote! I am brilliant.
Some days later…
Ah now, people. What’s going on? I’ve got significantly less than a handful of votes… Sure, what does it matter? Settle yourself.
The next day…
Still? No more? Indignation. Huff.
(I may need to revise this post to present myself in a better light.)
Turning into a stroppy cow, I actually emailed people, demanding they vote for me. Some were gracious enough to do so. Now I’ve got votes in double figures and I’m embarrassed at my behaviour. Apologies, friends and family. A bit like the team building day; I’ve been winding myself up with totally unnecessary fuss and bother. It’s meant to be a bit of fun for goodness sake! All that angst. Why? Why? Why would I do that?
All because I didn’t want to look like I’d failed.
I may usually avoid competition (let’s just ignore this for the minute), but it seems that’s not just because I always lose, so I can’t be bothered to try. It’s because I always lose, and I hate to lose.
Time to celebrate good blogging in all its varieties. Time to lose the diva. And, um, time for us all to vote again…