the hungry eye sees far

When something is on your mind, you see variations of it everywhere. If you have a wee notion for someone, you’ll spot them the instant you walk into a crowded bar; if you are broken hearted due to miscarriage, all you’ll see are babies and toddlers, swarming about the park, giggling and beautiful. We’re preoccupied, and our mind focusses on that theme.

It should be no surprise that I clicked on three links on the same topic the other day- two of them were connected to Module 1 of my #SHCR experience (it feels like a different thing than a course). The other was on Marie’s blog- a regular read, full of good thoughts and challenging thinking. Well, it shouldn’t have been a surprise, but my head exploded.

Link #1- Brené Brown: The power of vulnerability. Brown talks about connection giving meaning and purpose to our lives, and that vulnerability is vital in making those connections. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable means we can be joyful, whole hearted, and kinder to ourselves and others. She also tells us about the nervous breakdown she had on the way to believing that for herself… It’s a very entertaining, persuasive talk.

Link #2 – Journeying Beyond Breast Cancer. We know that Marie’s blog is always worth reading, but this post chimed- reflections on blogging, life and health- storytelling, connection, vulnerability.

Link #3- just in case I wasn’t getting the message, I clicked on this post by LeadershipFreak The Most Powerful way to Enhance Influence. By this stage, you’ll not be surprised that I found the message Connect by gently stepping toward people with an open heart. And, in the comments, a thought that summed up all of the messages I’d been getting that day Vulnerability is like a hug. You can’t embrace anything without first being OPEN.

hugs

We spend much of our lives protecting ourselves. This may not be the way to get things done, and, counter intuitively, it actually damages us. Life is easier when we have support. But we have to acknowledge that need first. It’s not a failing: it’s our humanity.

Feel the love, people. Go and hug someone (dogs & pillows count). Let’s all try being openly imperfect humans. No need to pretend we know what we’re doing. Muddling through, together, trying and failing and trying again- that’s grand. That’s how it works best.

 

 

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9 thoughts on “the hungry eye sees far”

  1. It is still hard to do, give up the hard won (sometimes necessary?) armour. It is especially hard for those who when open have been hurt/damaged. Maybe that’s the difference between abuse and life’s rich tapestry that always brings a bit of pain somehow and you grow through it. I joined the SCHR course after your last post – it will happen too early in my day for webjoining in, but I then spent yesterday clicking from site to site and feeling great about all the good compassionate make a difference stuff. Still want to know how an open person can spot abuse before the damage done is too great – looks like there may be help in the next couple of classes. Keep spreading the word. Hugs and XXX Elspeth

    1. Allowing oneself to be vulnerable isn’t an easy thing. I used to never ask for help, and then be annoyed when I didn’t get it, because my loved ones were somehow supposed to read my mind. That’s partly how I lost a marriage! I’m making progress.
      It will be interesting to see how #SHCR addresses issues of abuse, power differentials, the strength of the status quo and all the nasty stuff 🙂
      I’m not at all surprised you signed up- I was sure you’d find it interesting. I’m looking forward to more discussions!

  2. I love everything about this post – especially the cartoon image at the end. I’m a big fan of Brene Brown’s work on vulnerability. Not everyone gets why I share such intimate and personal details about my own life, but I can honestly say that we do each other no favours by hiding the real truth of who we are. I love to quote writer Elizabeth Lesser who says we are all bozos on the bus contrary to the self-assured image we work so hard to present to each other on a daily basis. Every single person on this bus called Earth hurts; it’s when we have shame about our failings that hurt turns into suffering. In our shame, we feel an outcast, as if there is another bus somewhere, rolling along on a smooth road. But we are on the bus that says BOZO on the front, and we worry that we may be the only passenger on board. When we realize that we aren’t the only one on that bus, we find ourselves among friends and we can sit back, and enjoy the ride 🙂

  3. i love this post! It covers a lot of things that have been in my mind recently too.

    I’d never heard of Brene Brown until I read Amanda Palmer’s book The Art of Asking and she wrote the introduction to that. You might like that book too – it is definitely self-indulgent in parts, but she writes a lot about the need to ask, to open up and be vulnerable, and how the action of asking (and giving) is about trust. I enjoyed it.

  4. I have only know Brene Brown for a few months, and I am very inspired by her. I think it’s very hard to allow for vulnerability when the openness is sometimes abused, but that doesn’t change the message. It is a sure thing that I have missed out on many opportunities because of fear of vulnerability. I think you were definitely getting that message as you opened up to hear. Very cool, and an inspiration, Fiona.

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